Randomness: Weddings of 2013, treatment & finale!

Long time, no write :(

I'm so sorry I've been absent for awhile, but I'm back!

I've been busy, busy!

 

One of my best friends got married this past Saturday and I was her maid of honor.

We've been friends since 3rd grade. Crazy, huh?!

I'm so happy for her & feel honored to be a part of her beautiful day!

She was gorgeous AND although it was very hot (outdoor wedding), it didn't rain!!

It was a beautiful ceremony focused on Christ being the foundation of a marriage.

Now the happy couple are on their "mini-moon" and I can recoup from the festivities.

I would never let Lyme Disease get in the way of a beautiful union like 2 of my best friends' weddings the past couple months!

Here are a few pictures from this weekend...

 Getting my hair done!

 Viola! Isn't that a cool hairstyle?!

 The Bride & I :)

 The Brides of 2013

 The Bride & her maids

 

Not only have I been busy with Mindy's wedding, I have continued my IV treatments.

It has continued to be rough because of the dying of bacteria (Herxhiemer reaction), but luckily, I have seen the fruits of this not-so fun treatment protocol.

I went to the doctor a few weeks ago and for the first time in a long time...drum roll please... we can see some improvement! It wasn't a huge improvement, but it's a few rays of light coming through the end of the tunnel. I've only been on IV for a month & a half so that's pretty good...I'll take it!

Hopefully, I'll be able to make even more progress so I won't have to have this lovely (not) PICC line for 6 months, but I guess if that's what it takes, I'll have to tough it out.

Also, our gofundme fundraiser to help pay for this treatment (not covered by insurance) is going really well! Although we have not met our goal, we can feel God providing! If you don't mind, please keep me in your prayers for both healing & finances...thank you so much!

 

Last but not least, I started reading a new book titled, Red Letter Revolution. Woa-it's really good! So good that I've had to put off my finale post of Following in Your Footsteps series. There is too much good stuff that has opened my eyes even more to following in Christ's footsteps. So get ready, the next post will be the last post of the series (hopefully tomorrow)!

Bible Reading Plan:
Today: Isaiah 31-35
Tuesday: Isaiah 36-41
Wednesday: Isaiah 42-44
Thursday: Isaiah 45-48
Friday: Isaiah 49-53
Saturday: Isaiah 54-58

 

 PS- Kindle & Nook have a special sale price on A Year of Biblical Womanhood by Rachel Held Evans for only $2.99 until the 31st! I'm not paid to advertise this either, I just love the book so much, I figured I'd share this awesome deal with you!

 

I heard a whisper in the dark...

If you've been following my blog and know my story, you know that I'm still on this journey called Lyme Disease treatment. It's definitely been a long one and at times very difficult, but there have been many times where God has whispered into my heart and reminded me that He is here for me. Another common reminder from Him has been to use this time to grow. Let me tell you, I have grown in so many ways since the beginning of this ride, but there is always more growth to be had.

 

The verse, "Be still and know that I am God" (Psalm 46:10) has always been a challenge for me. It doesn't necessarily mean to stand still like a statue, but rather to let go and relax. It's been very difficult for me to spend this time taking care of my body and not being able to work, especially since I just graduated from college. I was ready to hit the ground running and start the new phase of my life, but my diagnosis ruined that.

 

I have to constantly remind myself that it's okay that I'm not working and that it's not a reflection on me, but simply a unique situation in which my health comes first (it really always should). I have to let go, relax, and trust that through this time there is continued growth and healing.

 

A couple nights ago I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone and I was sharing all the great news of the day. I felt so loved, so supported and very grateful. Although I felt really bad physically, my heart was swelling with love. (Side note- because insurance only pays for a month of IV antibiotics we have to raise money to pay for the following months, as well as other medicine and medical bills. It's been almost 2 years and we feel forced to ask for help.) That day a few people donated on gofundme and we had great news about the possibility of a benefit, so of course, I was thrilled. My heart simply wanted to praise God because once again, I knew that He does provide and He is good.

 

Fast forward about 30 minutes...the pain that I was experiencing was intense. It wasn't in one place, but all over my body. In fact, it brought tears to my eyes. That doesn't happen often, but when it does my mind races to places that aren't so happy. Thoughts of anger, disappointment, confusion and sadness. You see, Lyme Disease treatment is a lot like chemotherapy...you have to get worse before you get better. When the bacteria is being killed off, toxins are released which causes temporary exaggerated symptoms, also known as the Herxheimer reaction. So most of the time when I am feeling really bad, I remind myself "It's okay, the bugs are being killed!", but there are other times when I say, "Enough is enough!" This was one of those times.

 

It's crazy how I can be so happy to the point of tears and then all of the sudden those tears turn sour. Maybe it was the Devil trying to take away my praise or maybe it was simply the consequence of this aggressive Lyme treatment. Either way, I didn't like it.

 

In the midst of all this pain, there was a stirring in my soul and I heard a whisper in my heart. The whisper comforted me, stopped my tears, and I knew that God was there. He was holding me and wiping away my tears. I always know that God is with me, but there are sometimes where His presence is magnified. Just like there are times when I hear His voice audibly, but most of the times I don't. That night, the stirring of my soul pushed me to write and I realized that God was whispering to me in the dark...

 

"You sweep over me like an ocean wave.

Overwhelmed by your power and refreshed by your provision, You prove to me that the world isn't all bad and that You are constantly moving to bring about Your glory for You are good. I lift my hands in the awe of the way You move."

 

"Although it doesn't make sense...

Although it hurts...

It doesn't stop You from loving me and me from loving You.

You speak through the disappointment...

You speak through the pain...

To remind me that I'm not alone.

Nothing can separate me from Your love...

Not trials, not pain, not disappointment...

You continually love me through it all."

 

I say all of this to say, that even in the darkness and even through the pain, God continues to move...continues to woo us...continues to show us that He is there for us, to comfort us along the way.

 

Have you ever been in a rough situation where God clearly spoke to you? Or maybe where you simply felt His presence?

I'd love to hear about your experience :)