Wednesday, February 12, 2014 isn't always easy

Guess what?!
I got my PICC line taken out after almost 6 months!!
My doctor decided that I'm doing well enough to take it out. Hallelujah!
I was so excited...well, I'm still excited!
Now, this doesn't mean I'm done with treatment, unfortunately.
I'm on a strong cocktail of oral antibiotics to eliminate the cyst form, l-form, and biofilm of the Lyme bacteria, which I'm already starting to feel pretty rough from it.
At times, it feels like this journey is never ending, BUT I've never been so close to the finish line and I'm stoked. My goal is to be able to start working part-time (I learned my lesson from working last time...patience & don't push it) this fall.
I'm especially excited to be able to take a shower without a plastic sleeve on my arm (to keep the port dry). Oh the little joys of life! Actually, this is a BIG joy.
On top of that, I'm feeling really motivated so I'm going back to an almost 100% raw diet, detoxing like crazy (infrared sauna here I come!) and start slowly with Pilates [eek!]. My immune system is still weak so hopefully by doing these things, it will strengthen and help my body heal faster.
Whew, this is a full time job...that's for sure.
If you'd like, please continue to pray for me...I would really appreciate it!


I've been reading the Gospel of John and two things have stood out to me:
1) Jesus said, "truly, truly" a lot!
2) People, including His disciples really had trouble believing that He was the Son of God.

It makes me wonder if I were there to walk the same streets Jesus walked, witness all the miracles, would I have believed? 

I'm not sure. I would hope I would have believed. Here we are today, not able to experience Jesus' life here on earth (although His Holy Spirit lives with us) and at times it's really easy for me to believe, but why were there so many people who didn't believe even when He was right in front of them?

What was the barrier that was keeping them from believing?

Maybe it was...
false preconceived ideas
or simply not open.

Nicodemus, in the third chapter of John, asks Jesus how he can be born again. His lofty intelligence made it hard for him to believe the "born again" concept that Jesus was teaching. Just like Nicodemus, our intelligence can get in the way of our faith, while other times it can help us.

In chapter four of John, the Samaritan woman at the well was stumped by Jesus' actions. Jews and Samaritans weren't allowed to interact with one another. She didn't understand why a Jew would ask for water from her. After Jesus told her that he was the Messiah, she went out and told about what had happened. She questioned if He could really be the Messiah. Other Samaritans began to flock to Jesus and soon realized that He was the Messiah, not because of what she said, but by what they had experienced. The Pharisees didn't believe either because they believed that the Messiah would obey the Law by keeping the Sabbath holy, would be a political leader and would bring judgment. Instead, He healed people on the Sabbath, didn't care about politics, and practiced forgiveness.
Preconceived notions prevented them from believing.

Later on in the tenth chapter, Jesus told many parables (stories) to prove to the Jews who He said He was...the Messiah. He didn't just tell one story, but several stories. He didn't say, "You don't get it...I give up trying to explain to you." He tried to show them with His miracles and present them with words, but they didn't believe. They demanded that He would simply tell them and He tried, but were they actually listening?
Were they truly open? It doesn't seem that way to me.

I think we all struggle with these barriers during our lives. Our brain, preconceived notions, and narrow-mindedness along with other reasons, tend to build up walls around faith. When these walls are built, its hard for faith to be freed. Faith can't be boxed in. We can't let these issues suppress the beauty and power of faith. We must let faith run free..

It makes me think of skydiving. Although I've never done it, I'd like to try it one day. I can imagine that while your standing at the edge of the plane, you must feel a wave of emotions...good and bad (I would think mostly bad haha). If you don't jump, you're enclosed in this little plane with walls of anxiety. If you jump, although it may be difficult, you are released from those nauseating emotions. You're free. Towards the end of your flight, it may get bumpy, but you land and, I can imagine, you feel a sense of relief.

I think that's what faith is. It's a risk that allows you get past yourself, be freed from those barriers and rest in relief that you have someone walking along side of you.

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I'm so glad you stopped by! I can't wait to hear your thoughts. Be blessed :)